Speaking of men…
Having been away for a while, I’ve been luxuriating in catching up on the blog entries from the folks in the WEL-Systems Blogging Community. I really enjoy that process as I bear witness to what it is to be included in open, authentic, real-life, real-time expressions of our humanity. As much as I get to know more of each of these terrific women, I also learn more about myself.
As always, I was reading Marie’s blog today and was drawn in to her enthusiasm and willingness to just live as she writes… or is it write as she lives. Not sure which and both are fine with me. But I digress…
In all that she shared, what struck me was her comment that “…men are not the enemy…”. I’m not sure why that stood out as it did, so I’ll just rumble along here and see what comes out.
I agree - men are not the enemy. And they, like we, are imperfect. How come we’re ok recognizing that in ourselves and yet, seem to harbour such discomfort in recognizing it in the men in our lives? Or perhaps more potent, as a generalization that can be applied to the much larger collective of men of the culture?
I agree – men are not the enemy. Nor are they necessarily allies and/or friends. How can it be otherwise? As the facade of their ‘maleness’ permeates every cell of their being and the facade of our ‘femaleness’ owns the very flesh we pour into our relentless pursuit of being the ‘right’ kind of woman, what chance do we stand of ever connecting in ways that are honest, authentic, open, clear and direct?
I agree – men are not the enemy. And far too often what is required before a man can find his humanity, is that the woman in his life must find hers. Like Marie being willing to discover how the snow blower works actually frees her husband from his invisible cord to all that is considered ‘male’ or ‘manly’ – and frees up the space for him to discover more of who he is without his gender owning the way he moves through the world.
I agree – men are not the enemy. It is not the person of the man who is the enemy, it is the mindlessness of being lost in the facade of who he has had to prove himself to be – to himself, to other men and to his culture. THAT is the enemy of us all.
