Out of the closet
The Women Gathering Google Group has launched and postings have begun. I wonder where we’ll be at this time in 2009?
We (women) seem to have ‘layers’ of revelation, moving in increments toward our own freedom to ‘be’. We begin by not even allowing ourselves to think the unthinkable! Then, over time, the thought persists and begins to seep into our conscious awareness, forming words inside our heads that speak to us in the privacy of our own minds.
If we feel safe enough, we seek out that one person we believe we can reveal our inner truth to and have it be held ‘in confidence’. As we gain perspective (and usually, seek someone else’s advice), we find the courage to reveal to one or two or three more others, gaining strength in our own thinking and slowly moving toward taking meaningful action in some way.
Unless, of course, the people we seek out all share the same model of the world (which is quite likely). In those moments, we are discouraged from pursuing what is different and encouraged to ‘try’ to manage with what we have. The outcome of this conversation is not always so enthralling.
Over almost 20 years of working with women (and 18 of those also working with men), I’ve noticed that our stories are the same, with changes in the details. They are about unexpressed anger, fears and frustrations, often tied to living lives we feel obligated or committed to, possibly even greatly invested in, and yet not enlivened or gratified by. We are enraged to stay and terrified to go.
We hide the full measure of who we are. We ‘do’ and ‘be’ what we feel is required and hold back our essential nature for fear that it will not be welcomed. Our deceptions are far more often information withheld or omitted than blatant untruths. Our greatest deceptions are of ourselves, not allowing ourselves to own what we already know.
Each of us, in turn, thinks it’s only us. We’re the only one who thinks this way/feels this way/has these desires or intentions or needs… and yet, when we come together, we discover it’s the same issue for so many, just different words to describe it.
In these last 18 years in conversations with individuals and groups, I’ve noticed that there is great power in the group.. in the pack… that makes it possible for acceleration to occur. Rather than sit and muse and ponder by myself in the closet; or with others in my same small world, being willing to engage with others allows me to hear for myself that I am not alone. Not only that, it makes it possible for me to piggy-back on the insights and discoveries of another, avoiding the passage of time and investment of effort that it might have required for me to get there by myself.
In these collectives, we become willing to come out of the closet and just be ourselves! In doing so, we discover that there are far more women who are like me than NOT like me; and far more women who are seeking to grow and expand and engage than there are women who seek earnestly to stay tied to their history.
The Women Gathering Google Group is an invitation to come out of the closet; to be ourselves in the presence of others and discover that we’re still lovable, we’re still ok and the sky has not fallen in. Breathing into and inhaling the evolution of others as it unfolds makes it possible for us to exhale and life differently… now! This living, organic collective Journal is an invitation to choose to be transparent – to ourselves and to others – and to discover the power of simply being authentic. We don’t need to give advice to anyone, we just need to be true to ourselves and that speaks volumes to the world.
It will be what it will be. It is an invitation to explore and discover and, most importantly, ENGAGE! We have become so passive… such voyeurs in our notions of living. It is one thing to talk about discovery; it is quite another to experience discovery. Without the body engaging, experience is impossible. What’s left is knowledge and the opinions/direction of others. I don’t know about you but I’ll take my chances and live my life by my own choices.
See you there!
